You’re not Listening …

If you’re quick to judge, quicker to insert your own truth,
You’re not listening.

If you say, “I know exactly how you feel,”
Then talk about yourself,
You’re not listening.

If you’re thinking of a comeback,
A response,
A solution,
A quick fix,
You’re not listening.

If your advice arrives before your understanding,
On the wings of should-haves, could-haves, and why-nots,
You’re not listening.

If your tough love speaks in the language of blame,
Seeks to hurt, seeks to shame,
You’re not listening.

If you weigh my pain against the world’s and say,
“At least it’s not worse,”
You’re not listening.

If you dismiss my emotions,
Replace them with the ones you deem more appropriate,
You’re not listening.

If you wrap my grief in soft words to muffle my pain,
If you comfort me to escape your own discomfort,
You’re not listening.

If my truth unsettles you,
If you refuse to sit with my storm,
You’re not listening.

If I have to clarify myself to you,
And defend myself from you—
You’re not listening.

So the next time you say, “Talk to me,”
I’ll ask you — “Are you ready to really listen to me?”